Halloween II (2009 Reboot) Review

“What the hell did I just watch?” Those were my first thoughts as the end credits rolled on Rob Zombie’s latest film, his re imagining of “Halloween II.” I’ll admit right at the start that I enjoyed Zombie’s remake of the original “Halloween.” He gave Michael Myers an interesting back story and filled the film with some true emotions. “Halloween II” is full of something too, but it isn’t emotion.



After a brief introduction to the events of the last film, including showing how Michael (Mane) escaped after the ambulance he was riding in had an accident, the story picks up almost one year later. It’s a few days before Halloween and the town of Hadonfield is preparing for the day. All of the first films’ regulars are here. Laurie Strode (Taylor-Compton) still has nightmares about that night. Dr. Loomis (McDowell) is about to launch a tour promoting his book, “The Devil Walks Among Us.” And Michael Myers has once again returned to town to find his sister so that they can be reunited with their mother (Sheri Moon Zombie), who, since her death, only appears as a ghostly figure in white, accompanying a white horse. Loomis doesn’t understand the bad taste he’s showing in promoting the tragedy. It’s so bad that the film features the rarest of all characters, a publicist with a conscience. Of course, because of the good doctors’ book, Laurie finds out that she is really Michael’s sister. Can a family reunion be in the future?



What can you say about a film that is so off the charts that it makes references to “Cat Ballou” and “Austin Powers” star Mike Meyers? How about, to steal animated critic Jay Sherman’s best line, “it stinks!” Nothing from what Zombie achieved in the first film is even remotely repeated here. Where I thought Michael was portrayed with some sympathy originally, here he is just a rage filled monster. Taylor-Compton seems to have regressed to only being able to scream hysterically to convey any emotion. But then how can you expect someone who sleeps in a bed room that includes the numbers 666 and a poster of Charles Manson on the wall to behave quietly? Don’t the girls in Hadonfield listen to N-Sync? And what is the significance of the Moody Blues’ “Nights in White Satin,” whose ancient film appearance seems to run constantly on the local television station. Of course, those flickering images come off better then the film on screen, which is often both too dark and, I'm hoping, intentionally fuzzy and out of focus. The cast is full of some interesting choices, including “Weird” Al Yankovich and, God bless her, Margot Kidder, who ironically portrays a psychiatrist. The only cast member who looks like they know how to act is former Oscar nominee Brad Dourif, who once again stars as local Sheriff Brackett. In fact, Dourif is so good that his performance adds half of a star to my review. That being said, on a scale of zero to four I give “Halloween II”